The Turmoil : a zine on display in the 25x25 exhibition at SMU de Suantio Gallery during the 2025 Arts Fest
This is a pdf capture of the zine created by Cecilia Lee Jia Yi for the 2025 Arts Fest 25x25 exhibition which contains a poetry inspired by Dang Xuan Hoa's untitled self-portrait (2007).
"I’ve always struggled with anxious attachment, where love feels like both sanctuary and threat. the turmoil traces that emotional cycle: fixation, emotional hypervigilance, and the spirals that follow when affection feels uncertain or unreciprocated.
When I first encountered Dang Xuan Hoa’s self-portrait, I was struck by the silent unrest. The jagged lines and bruised palette mirrored the feeling of being trapped in one’s own mind, the internal noise of someone trying to hold themselves together.
It raised the questions that shaped this piece: What does inner conflict look like? Does healing ever arrive, or does the turmoil simply take on new shapes?
I used breath-like spacing, short lines, and recurring stanzas to evoke emotional claustrophobia, mirroring the looping nature of anxiety and grief.
Additionally, the refrain, “before the healing always comes the turmoil”, begins with certainty but unravels into doubt: “but what if the turmoil never ends?”
This captures the contradiction of healing, the constant sway between hope and despair, and mirrors how anxious thoughts loop, escalate, and contradict themselves, distorting clarity.
Perhaps time doesn’t heal. It just teaches you to live with the bruise, without flinching, without letting it hollow you out." - Cecilia Lee Jia Yi, Year 3, Lee Kong Chian School of Business
"I’ve always struggled with anxious attachment, where love feels like both sanctuary and threat. the turmoil traces that emotional cycle: fixation, emotional hypervigilance, and the spirals that follow when affection feels uncertain or unreciprocated.
When I first encountered Dang Xuan Hoa’s self-portrait, I was struck by the silent unrest. The jagged lines and bruised palette mirrored the feeling of being trapped in one’s own mind, the internal noise of someone trying to hold themselves together.
It raised the questions that shaped this piece: What does inner conflict look like? Does healing ever arrive, or does the turmoil simply take on new shapes?
I used breath-like spacing, short lines, and recurring stanzas to evoke emotional claustrophobia, mirroring the looping nature of anxiety and grief.
Additionally, the refrain, “before the healing always comes the turmoil”, begins with certainty but unravels into doubt: “but what if the turmoil never ends?”
This captures the contradiction of healing, the constant sway between hope and despair, and mirrors how anxious thoughts loop, escalate, and contradict themselves, distorting clarity.
Perhaps time doesn’t heal. It just teaches you to live with the bruise, without flinching, without letting it hollow you out." - Cecilia Lee Jia Yi, Year 3, Lee Kong Chian School of Business